Thursday, June 30, 2011

Let's Party

In the past year, as I've delved into the facebook world, I have been amazed at the achievements of my high school classmates. (BTW - if you haven't liked me on facebook yet, you can do it here, or on the sidebar.)

Joe Weirzbecki is a tea-party guru.
Alex and Chelsea are the founders of BreezyMama.
I already told you about Ted Johnson.
Jeff Keirns is a producer in the world of Reality TV.
Ty Gurney runs a successful surf school in Hawaii.

But some of the achievements that I have been the most impressed with are the ones I won't reveal. They are the few classmates who have confided in me about their sobriety. I am so proud of them for realizing that they had a problem, and doing something about it. I am so grateful for Alcoholics Anonymous that helps so many people realize their dreams. I  am such a huge believer in the 12 steps and have found great happiness in my life by following its principles with my codependency. Sometimes just living a normal healthy life is the best accomplishment of all. And really, we all have addictions to overcome. It takes a lot of courage to admit that.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

What's your talent?

LG and I share a talent.
We both play the piano.
Kind of.
He sent this video to me this morning.
How cute of him, huh?
I love it when he finds cool things online and sends me the link.
We have a cyber love, what can I say?

I wanted to pay it forward.
So I decided to share the video and tell you that it made me happy for two things today.

One - Harry Potter, the final movie, will soon be here.
Two - He loves the piano like I do.

I remember the first (and quite possibly the only) purchase I ever made from an infomercial. I bought it proudly with my newly obtained credit card. Right off that 800 number. I was 17 and had just gained my independence. And what did I buy? The three set cassette tapes of Masterful Piano. Oh how I loved the variety of the song choice, the beauty of the moods and the tone of the piano. I should have known then that I only needed to consider then men with talent on the keyboard as suitable suitors.

Many things make me happy in this world, but listening to my man play the piano is at the top of the list.

Today, I interviewed again for that same job. This time it is a daytime position that I was encouraged to apply for when they turned me down last time. I humbled myself and endured another interview. I hate selling myself, but I knew I had to do a better job. So I socked it to them. I hope I wasn't overboard.

"What is my greatest strength?" they asked.

"I'm a people person."

It's my talent. What can I say? I can talk to anyone. Sometimes (o.k. oftentimes) I might stick my foot in my mouth, but if you are in my vicinity, I will know something about you before I walk away.

Like today, when I changed my goal of upselling them on the sharpies to upselling them on why they needed me in their call center, the lady interviewer told me that her favorite color sharpie is purple.

If I land the job, I will be taking her a purple sharpie.

Not just because she is cool, but because she laughed when I told her if I had to come for a third round of interviews, I expected a purple sharpie at the desk next time.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Your daily funny

I am trying my darndest to keep you guys entertained.



And thank God for all your blessings.

Thank me in a comment. :)

June Visiting Teaching Message

In the Mormon church, we try hard to take care of one another.
One way we do so is through visiting teaching and home teaching.

We visit with each other every month to check in.
We ask, "How are you doing?"
We say, "I sure love you."

We discuss the topic of the month.
I loved the part this month that said, 
"providing for ourselves and others is evidence that we are disciples of the Lord Jesus Christ." ~ Julie B. Beck
Consider yourself visited and taught.
So, how are you doing?
I sure love you.

Family Photos in Beautiful Knoxville

Please excuse the post full of pictures of my beautiful family. It may not be that funny. But it will sure be some eye candy.

We've been married almost 14 years.
We've had 4 kids.
We've only had our photos taken at JC Pennies.
Do you spell JC Penny plural
JC Pennies or JC Penny's?
You get the point.

This is a confession that tells you two things about our family.
1 - We've been poor.
2- We didn't value a good photographer near enough.

Our friend Jessie was a Saint.
She was in the middle of moving
and we were leaving the State of Tennessee
the very next day.

I had to have some pictures with
my precious dogwoods.
She not only obliged.
But, rocked the house.
Thank you Jessie.
I will love you forever.

Jessie is about to have her first baby any day, so she will probably take a little time off. Or she will be shoving her camera in the face of her best subject ever. She also happens to be a perfectionist. As evidenced by the photos. She doesn't have a site yet, but if you want to be put in touch with her, just let me know. She will be in the Knoxville area for a little while longer.

I literally cried my eyes out while looking at these photos tonight.
How I miss my Tennessee.
We took these photos at the Knoxville Botanical Garden and Arboretum.
It's a beautiful place, much like all of East Tennessee.
Lucky for us we got to enjoy it on a perfect Spring day.
It was raining.
Did I mention it was a perfect way to say goodbye.

 This is where I wanted the photo, but Jessie being the professional that she is said that we couldn't set it up right. But, thank you Jessie for sending me this one shot of THE spot. It's just beautiful. And so fitting of TN. From my favorite trees, to the old rock structure, all the way to the rusted old metal.

Our Sweet Caroline.
Her nicknames are Curls, Boots, and Shirley Temple.

She looks just like her daddy.
Even their smiles are identical.

Our not so sweet Caroline.

Beautiful Bella.

Sweet Sophia.

Adorable Abigail.

The whole family.

The whole family with the dogwoods.

The only picture LG and I have of us kissing since we got married.
You would never know that we were in a fight that day.

Thank you to Jessie for solving all of our 8 years of marital issues that played out during our time in Tennessee in one final moment.
It's hard to be mad at someone when the photographer requests a kiss.

My favorite picture of all time.
Does it not just scream Tennessee?

I really do love this man so much.
Even more than I love his wife.

Monday, June 27, 2011

Guest Post - Lynnae

Lynnae Boyer Weller is a close family friend.
She writes eloquently at Life's Little Parables.
And she wrote up this guest post in a day.
Did I tell you she is awesome?
More like family really.
She, like all of her other family members, 
are always good for a laugh or 100.

I blogged about her mother's laugh here.
I sure do miss it still.
But, Nancy's laugh most definitely lives on in her children.
As evidenced by this awesome guest post.

My little family has a long history with wolves. We have a very small zoo where we live, but It's biggest exhibit is the wolves. When my daughter was 3, we visited the zoo and watched the wolves from an observation deck. The deck is open air and keeps you about 8 feet above the ground level. One wolf apparently thought my daughter would be a tasty treat. He trotted right over, sat down in front of her, and started licking his lips. He kept staring at her and licking his lips until we left! Needless to say, I kept a very tight hand on her that visit!

Since then, the zoo built a nice building you can go in to observe the wolves on ground level through a large, thick window. The first time we went there, one of the wolves apparently took a disliking to my son. The wolf saw him through the window and tried to urinate on him! Seriously disgusting, wolf!

Speaking of disgusting things that wolves do, my daughter, who is now 7, had the opportunity to see a presentation on wolves with one of her friends. She learned when a wolf makes a large kill, and is unable to take it back to the den, the wolf will urinate on the meat to "mark" it as his own. All the kids in the crowd were completely disgusted. However, my daughter thought about it for a minute and said, "Well, actually, it's just like he's putting his own sauce on it!"

I guess that disgusting wolf was just trying to put some sauce on my son!

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Korea's Got Talent

It's time for a feel-good video.
It's Sunday and I rest.

This video is a universal message.
Love everyone.

Be kind,
for everyone
you meet
is fighting
a hard battle. ~Plato

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Blogging Sabbatical

Hi everyone.
Wow I am late getting this post out today.
Kind of.

We went camping last night. So fun.
I decided that Utah is the perfect place for camping.
Gorgeous, everywhere you look.
We got to take the bike trail to Bridal Veil Falls.
Come and join us any time.
But please don't expect us to ice climb.

Then I came home and cleaned out the garage.
And have been doing the after camping duties.
Laundry x6.
Cooler cleaning.
Car excavating.

Then I remembered that it was Kids' Day
at our local Grocery Store, Macey's.
We ran over for the last hour.
Hot dog, chips and a soda for 25 cents.
Free popcorn, ice-cream, and bounce houses.
25 cent cotton candy.
Yum yum.
To think we almost missed out.
I love Macey's extra large flag.
It makes me want to shop no where else.
I will be showing you more photos real soon.
I can't get enough of the blue skies, mountain ranges, and flying red white and blues.

At 3:00, I was in total awe at how much we had accomplished today.
We had also snuck in Bella's baseball game and team pictures.
And don't forget that we broke camp this morning.

Anyhow, I've been busy. And taking lots of pictures for future posts.
And I wanted you all to know that I haven't been slacking.
Have you seen all the new changes on the blog?
I am liking them very much.
Notice the box at the top left. It shows my Top 5 Commenters.
It looks like Sheila and Holly are going to have to duke it out for that write up next month.
I can't wait to see who pulls it off.

And I can't wait to tell you about my new game to play next month.
I am using this creative brain of mine to try and come up with fun that you can experience no where else.
Funny needs to be fun too.

I also am featuring my very first ad from Deseret Book. Wahoo.

If you haven't taken the time yet to like me on facebook, or become a google follower, please do take a minute. It will help me out a lot. And I will love you forever regardless.

Also, check out my new community on blogfrog. I am excited to make it grow. I have joined other blogging communities at blogfrog and it has introduced me to other bloggers I would have never met otherwise. I think blogfrog is great. You can also access my community through the tab up top. Pretty snazzy.

Hope you are all having a wonderful weekend.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Oh no!

I have been getting all kinds of updates from Knoxville.
Friends without power for days.
And just when they were almost in the clear,
another round of 
tornadoes came causing  more chaos!

Of all the updates I have received, Amanda's post on Facebook has been the most entertaining of all, by far.

Her caption:
Oh, no! What do I do?

There is always humor.
Even in the midst of suffering.
I prefer the laughter
over the pain.
It's soothing to my soul.

I am so grateful for friends that 
always make me laugh.
Love you Amanda.

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Potter and Johnson

I need to blog. I need to dig into some photos on my hard drive and share some fun stuff we've done.
I need to write some funny stuff.

But what am I doing?

Watching this of course:

Pottermore has my loyalty.

Even if that darn JK refuses to write another book!

I've also been looking for lost classmates for my 20 year high school reunion.

That is so exciting. It also makes me feel very old. It's also puzzling a bit.
Why can't anyone find Ted Johnson?

He has his own wikipedia page and the only way I could think to find him was to send his booking agent a note. I hope he will pass it along. It wouldn't be the same without Ted. He's the one that broke the news to me that I won at my election for Sophomore class president. I should have kissed him like this. You can get away with things like that in the moment of excitement. And out of all the boys I kissed in high school I really did my bragging rights a great disservice by not kissing the future SuperBowl champ. 4 superbowls people.

I am now really tempted to write nasty things about the Mormon boy who had the gall to call me a jack mormon in my yearbook who has repeatedly ignored my facebook friend requests. Funny thing is, he was a football player too. But never made it past college ball. And he was a kicker...not quite the same as sweet and hunky Ted the linebacker. And to think my friends thought he would be a match made in heaven for me when he moved in our Senior year. Blah on you Mr man who shall not be named Voldemort, but all of our classmates know who I am talking about. I dare you to show up at our reunion. Double dog dare. And Ted better be there to back me up. Oh forget Ted, I've got my husband to back me. And even though LG wouldn't hurt a fly, he can outsmart anyone (o.k. most anyone) there I am sure. And after 20 years we better be past fist fighting.

So, I am now off to tumbling class. And then I will be slave driving all afternoon. These kids have got to do some chores! Sometimes I wish that the wizarding world was real. Accio clean laundry, please. Coming soon: the funny spells my kids invented.

I know you are dying for them now, but you are going to have to wait because I have to go and this post has been too long.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Show some love.

I have talented friends and family. In fact, I am pretty sure that everyone I know is uber talented.

I have recently been given two great opportunities to show some love.
They came through youtube.
Go figure.

This first video was done by the one and only Jimmy Hinson.
He writes music for video game. How cool is that?

Here is a song that he wrote to help earn money for his sister Emily who just donated her kidney to her sweet husband. The song is great and so are Emily and Jared. They are some of the sweetest people who deserve lots of love. You can imagine the financial strain of a kidney transplant on two college students, so send them a hug.

And do it in the form of a .99 c song purchase. Put the song on your ipod and next time you go and exercise, you can imagine yourself in a video game running to get to your kidney recipient in time. At the receiving end of your purchase will be these two sweet faces.

And you can also show some love to LG's cousin Eliza and her husband Kyle.
They have managed to make a Jimmy Wong video that is a tribute to their shared love for each other and the BYU campus. Pretty impressive.

Go here to vote for Kyle's music video.
Just the name "Jimmy Wong contest" made me want to vote.

I love showing love.
Especially when it is so easy.

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Guest Post - Catherine

Catherine and Grant are some of our favorite people. Maybe I should say Grant and Catherine are some of our favorite people? Grant wouldn't like being referred to last. He has an ego to feed. Grant happens to be LG's cousin. He is Uncle Dirk's offspring. Therefore, my kinship is as strong as LG's.

For her guest post, Catherine has a cute little story to share. I hope none of you will take it as sacrilegious. You know how we love our Savior Jesus Christ. But when you love Him and teach your children about Him, you are bound to get a few funny stories.

Dakota was playing dress up and comes out with an off the shoulder outfit.
Here is how it goes:
Me: Dakota that's not modest.
 Her: Jesus wear outfits like this. 
Me: He does? 
Her: "Yeah remember the picture where he got cut in the boob??" 
Me: Oh yeah, that's right! and I had to laugh!

And I had to laugh too. That's why I begged Catherine to do this guest post. Aren't you glad I did? Kids say the darndest things.

Monday, June 20, 2011

Message from Home

Thanks to Amanda Woods
for a little piece of heaven.

All the way from Tennessee to Utah.
I love lazy Tennesseans.
And I love getting a good message
from a sign
or from inside.

Sunday, June 19, 2011

In The Moment

Thank you to NieNie for the video.

Powerful stuff.

I am so much better at living in the important moments on Sundays.

Thank you God for a day of rest.

Please help me to slow down during the week.

And please give me the strength to wake up early enough to surprise my man with the breakfast of his dreams. I know I can't live up to his mom in that way, but I have provided the man with four beautiful children, and I hope he knows how much I love him. And how when my life is over, all of my most important moments will include him.

I love you LG.

And Happy Father's Day to Duane and dad.
Thanks for all your moments. That add up to eternity. Can't wait to spend it all together.

Here is a great idea for a last minute Father's Day gift. Brought to you by my very own Sunday School teacher. She also happens to have a great blog. And she believes in enjoying the moments as evidenced by her killer Harry Potter parties. I hope I get to go next month.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

Job Interview

Yesterday I had a job interview. It's been a long time since I have interviewed for a job. I really want the job, but I am a little worried.

I think everyone worries after interviewing for work. In fact I think that the only people who can feel really confident after a job interview are those who have no feelings whatsoever.

I had to take a computer assessment. You all know I am computer savvy, right? How else could I blog like I do? But I am a little worried because there was this one question about using the shortcut function for searching. I answered with Ctrl+S (for search). Right? Makes the most sense. Wrong. The correct answer is Ctrl+F (for find). "How was I supposed to know that? I just use google," I tell my hubby. He says, "No Alice, you don't use that function online, but in word processing." Oh, yeah, I actually do faintly remember that function from back in my secretarial days. Too bad I couldn't remember the correct answer during the assessment. I even got this little voice in the back of my brain saying NO NOT CTRL+S, that would be too obvious  Too bad I can't call them up and say, "I know I got that question wrong but I will never forget it now." I am trying to console myself by thinking that I got every other question right. And you only had to pass the assessment, not ace it.

But, then I start freaking out about the interview portion. I replay every word out of my mouth. And you all know that can be a scary thing.

All I can do is chuckle and question myself as to WHY I told this story. Seriously, I have no shame. Two male interviewers and I pull out the story with the word pee in it? How did they even contain their laughter.

I will say one thing, that company that I just interviewed is one professional place. Those interviewers barely cracked a smile. Even when I tried to upsell them on the fact that they need colored sharpies instead of just plain black ones for their interviewees to write their names on the nametags. Just barely smiled, those two. Even if it was dress-down Friday, they were not giving up on their professionalism.

I bet they busted up as soon as they saw that my professionalism made it all the way out to the parking lot where my minivan awaited. At least I didn't pee on their floor from pure nervousness.

There's always an upside.

The self-talk that will be ensuing for the next few day at my house: at least you didn't pee on their floor Alice.

And if they don't hire you, no worries. You will still get to sleep through the night.

Oh, and the last but greatest calmer downer: you used to work there Alice. In a higher paying position. If they don't rehire you, it's not God's will.

And I will believe me. Because serenity is awesome. And the only way to get it is to believe and trust in God. He can work miracles. Even if I stick my foot in my mouth at every crossroads in my life.

Friday, June 17, 2011

Hunting for Clothes

I haven't done a thrifty post in a while. 

I can't wait to post my hubby's Father's Day gifts. 
I did good. 
Really good.

And this morning I realized that I hadn't done anything for our dads yet.
Not ugh to our dads, but ugh to my thoughtlessness.

So, the other day, Abigail and I went through her list of "to-pack" for her first year of church girl's camp.

Enter squeals of delight. 
And lots and lots of vicarious living.

To our dismay, Abigail needed a winter coat.
She lost hers sometime in December and has been making due with heavy sweatshirts ever since.
Once we made it to the move in April, and it wasn't so terribly cold here in Utah, we figured we wouldn't have to worry about it again until next year.
We thought wrong.
There is still snow on the ground at the campsite.

Where am I going to find a winter coat in the middle of June?
No problem. We may find an even BETTER winter coat this time of year.
If we shop at the thrift store.
Which we do.
A lot.

So, guess what?
We found a $300 Nils winter ski jacket in almost brand new condition for  $18. I then used my 20% off coupon and saved a few more bucks.
The girl loves her new jacket
and I love it too.
It's the prettiest most pale pink with black and white.
And apparently the black and white makes the pink acceptable.
Win win.

Needless to say, I'm a bargain hunter.
I like the idea of being a hunter.
On the prowl.

Anyhow, anyone with lots of kids knows that you save the hand me downs.
I guess Sophia and Bella will be the proud owners of a pale pink ski jacket someday.
Meanwhile, Abigail will be wearing it to camp,
and when she gets home, we will put it in her closet bin with the rest of her winter clothes.
Three times a year, I go through the bins.
Summer, winter, and back to school.
I've got it down to a science.

Three times a year, I take time with each child to inspect every article of their clothing.
We put "still using" articles back in the drawers and closet.
We hand down the "too small" but will fit your sister next season to the correct person's bin.
And we retrieve and put away from the bin the seasonals:
bathing suits, long sleeves, sweaters, coats, shorts, etc.

It's so exciting.
In a house full of girls,
clothes are a big hit.
And finding a shirt that you had forgotten 
about buying months before 
is the equivalent to remembering 
you have $20 in the pocket of your jeans.

Throughout the year, I buy "off season" on sale.
Meaning when winter and summer things go on sale,
I stock up in the appropriate sizes.
I put all my bargains in the bins.
When back to school time comes, 
I rarely have to get my kids anything 
because they usually have a few nice outfits waiting for them in their bin.
Outfits that I got for cheap.
Real cheap.
Oh and shoes I also got for cheap.
The new things lighten the disappointment from the hand me downs.
Or at least I like to think that they do.
But to tell you the truth,
with this system, I think my kids have an equal appreciation 
for new, handed down, or bought second hand.
I believe in affirmative action.
Equal opportunity for clothes of all backgrounds.

Caroline is wearing the things from this bin now.
Check out those cute tennis shoes and Tevas.
The tennis shoes were bought at Target last year for $2.
And the Teva's were from a yard sale for a $1.
Both are in excellent condition.
And used equally.

And here is Sophia's bin from last year.
Yeah for her teeny little frame.
All of her shorts still fit!
The only place I had to hunt was the bin at the house.

Thursday, June 16, 2011

Funny Beiber

Remember this old Justin Beiber post?

We love Justin Beiber around here.
Sophia especially loves it when we tease her about him.
I am not really in a writing mood,
so I am sharing with you things I find interesting on youtube.
This female version of Justin Beiber rocks house.
I believe her original song is only funny when she performs it.

I overheard another funny conversation at our house the other day.
It has nothing to do with Justin Beiber.
Unless showcasing that my kids are so beyond celebrity worship counts?

I was recently asked to work with the Cub Scout at church.
Yes, the Lord and the church as a whole both have a great sense of humor.
The mother of 4 girls is, of course, the perfect choice to be a Cub Scout Den Leader.
Needless to say, I've been trying to psych myself up about it.

Abigail turned to me at church when they announced my newest calling and said,
"Mom, it looks like you are finally going to get your boys."

So, later that day, I hear this:

Abigail to Bella: Bella, you are gonna have an in with the boys your age now.
Bella: Yeah, I know. Sweet.
Sophia: It's too bad mom doesn't get to work with the boys your age
Abigail: No, I don't want mom to work with the boys my age,
            I want her to work with the Eagle Scouts.
Sophia: Why?
Abigail: Those older boys are cuter. 14 and 15 year olds are just
Sophia: But the Eagles Scouts are older than that.
Abigail: Even better.

And I thought for a minute that Abigail was just vying for the more driven boys.
She could care less about Eagle Scout status.
She just wants those older boys.

I love eavesdropping on them.
I am predicting a day in the near future
that I will remind Abigail that she only wants an Eagle Scout.
Gotta keep that conversation at the top of my trick bag.
It may be very handy when LG and I don't approve a certain somebody.

Back to the original story.
I am happy to now understand more fully
why exactly Justin Beiber is irrelevant at our house.
Apparently my girls only want the Eagle Scouts.

I guess that's why I have to work in Cub Scouts.
Somebody has to start these boys on the right path.
They have to earn the Eagle to be worthy of my girls.
Or be 4 years older.
Precisely why Justin Beiber would never stand a chance.
How old is that kid? 8?

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

I Believe

I believe in laughter.

I believe in the Book of Mormon.

I believe that all religions get mocked.

I believe in Jesus.

I believe in my friend Daisy.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

C Jane's Rooftop Concert

I have blogged several times about my new favorite blog.

I sent Courtney (who happens to be NieNie's funny sister) an e-mail and asked her to guest post,
but I believe she has been so dang busy with 
that she hasn't been able to respond.

I do give her the benefit of the doubt
because I really like her.
And decided I should keep reading her, even if she doesn't read me.

And I really appreciate her sense of humor, her love for Provo and her efforts in the FREE rooftop series.
Did you hear the word FREE?
You all know how frugal I've become.
I jumped all over this opportunity.
I could satisfy my husband's love for jazz AND maybe hopefully run into my favorite blogger.
One out of two ain't bad.

We had a blast.
We got to listen to Mindy Gledhill, whom I really love.
And LG and I both got to check out a new Canadian artist that is all the rage: Meaghan Smith.
She was awesome. LG loved the souped up jazz form that is all her own.

I know crappy picture, but you all know my camera has been broken for a year.
I just thought you would like to have proof that we were actually there.

And, wow, what a view from the rooftop.
I love Utah.
I love my old workplace: NuSkin.
I love the mountains.
And I love our blue skies.
They just seem so much bluer than Knoxville's.

These really sweet college co-eds let us squeeze in front of them.
The rooftop was packed, and we arrived late because I mistakenly thought that concert was at Provo Town Center, not Provo Town Square.

We thought it was so funny that one of our sweet concert friends was smack dab in the middle of our self pic.
She suggested we take one without her in it.
I told her I was going to do a before and after on the blog,
but she never asked for the blog address.
I guess it's better that way.

Man, I need to color my hair desperately.
Wally world has been out of my color for weeks.

Here is another one of our newest friends, she is trying to hide from my behind the head shot.
I was trying to document how crowded the place was.
It was nervous making.
LG's lawyer came out in him and he commented several times that we had to be breaking some fire-code and that if we had an earthquake we would all be done.
O.k maybe that wasn't the lawyer in him, maybe it was the claustrophobia speaking.

One of the most fun things about attending a really crowded space, is people watching.
You got a picture yesterday of the chubby little boy next to us with chocolate all over his face.
I also tried to capture the family with 5 kids a few rows up. The dad was so cute wearing that baby backpack, but once again my crappy camera disappointed.

LG and I are always dumfounded at the new styles.
We are so behind the times.
We pegged this guy as gay for sure.
But, then he was all lovey with the lady.
Chalk another one up to old age.

Raising Boys

As you all know, I know nothing about raising boys. Well, I should give myself some credit. I do know a few things. Just from what I have heard from friends:

  1. baby boys require vaseline and guaze.
  2. the boys in kindergarten mark territory by spreading crayons, trash, and glue as far spread as possible (direct contrast to the girls who all keep their stuff neat and tidy) There has to be some kind of case study here between the hunting vs. gathering instincts.
  3. boys are way less whiny but way more active.
  4. boys are dirty and stinky and pee everywhere.
  5. boys don't require hair styling. (how lucky)
  6. boys tear holes in their jeans twice as much as girls do.
  7. boys hit.
  8. boys love sand and dirt. (but so do my girls)
  9. boys eat more.
What am I missing here mommas? Please do tell me. I can only live vicariously.
All I can think about right now is this old post

10. boys have more butt crack.

Check out this chubby boy that was sitting next to us at this concert.
LG and I feel so cultured. We have attended 2 concerts in a month's time. Utah is good for us, I think.
He was part of some of the best entertainment of the night for LG and I. How darling is he?
Hope his mom won't mind the posted picture. She was busy on her phone allowing me to steal this gem without asking permission.

Check out this tagline contest I won today . It's so great to have your creative juices recognized from time to time. And I really like the lesson the picture teaches. I know nothing of boys, but if a picture like this got taken, I know one thing only, dad was not around. Ladies, dress your boys macho. I want my girls to have some real manly men to marry someday.

Sunday, June 12, 2011


It is my belief that every individual on this earth can find commonality with one another.

What do I have in common with this Nigerian artist?

Besides that fact that we are both Mormon?

I love the rain too.

LeGrand and I love the rain.

I don't understand how anyone can not appreciate rain. It is essential to life. It is relaxing. It is music to my ears. It's a reminder that I am privileged to live on God's earth.

Saturday, June 11, 2011


"Are all my desires pure?" I asked myself while reading this recent address.

I desire to love my fellow man.

I desire to live a long life.

I desire to spend quality time with my kids.

I desire to serve God.

I desire to share truth with my friends.

I desire to be humble.

I desire to be wise.

I desire a close relationship with my personal Savior Jesus Christ.

I desire to have a strong marriage.

I desire to teach my girls to be healthy and happy and strong.

I desire to love myself better.

I desire to help others.

I desire eternal life.

Yet, I judge others, refuse to eat right and exercise enough, tell my kids to leave me alone, pretend I don't know that people need service, withhold my beliefs in discussions, think I am too important, refuse to implement knowledge I have gained, slack on my personal scripture study and prayer, yell at my husband, assume I always have time to teach that to my kids later, engage in unhealthy self-talk, feel I lack skills, abilities, or means to make a difference, and last but not least, I looked at that pornographic picture that came up on my screen when I google image searched desire. Gross. Why did I do it? Yuck. I should have known better than to google search "desire". All I could say to myself is "so much for effective spyware."

I guess I am on the phase between desire and choices.

My newest desire is to never see anything like that again. I am pretty sure I am scarred enough that I will never ever falter on that choice again.

Anyone can desire. The hard part is in the choice and the actions. But choice and action are where the rewards await us.

I so want to change, achieve, and become. And I so want to forget that nasty picture.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Father's Day Nots

I may not be able to tell you what you should buy for your dad/hubby for Father's Day, but I can tell you what NOT to buy.

My hubby, LG, was checking out Amazon's list of Father's Day sale items and gave me the low down.

Here was his strongest reaction.

Tupperware? Tupperware! Tupperware?! Show me one dad in the universe that would want Tupperware for Father's Day.

Knives are just a tad bit better, but seriously? Who is running this website? Every metrosexual homosexual girly stay-home dad they could find?

Hmm. Robotic lawnmower. (said in a non-emotional voice)

Me: I thought you would love that?

LG: Oh yeah, that is cool. I would love that.

My man would also love that metal detector. It's a gadget. Anything gadget is beyond good. We decided that Ikea is the best store ever for a date-night because it combines a man's love for gadget with a woman's love for decor and beauty. He would also love the flatscreen or the wireless wireless forecast station.

Looking at the list this morning, I don't need my man to give me his two cents to instantly pick out other items that would be a bust at my house: lava lamp (he is 35 now), Jalepeno Rack (what the crap is that?), the turkey fryer (he wouldn't even be able to try it out until November), the picture frames (he doesn't love us that much), Desktop Humidor (I know we are kind of less than cultured but what is that? Is it just that I am a Mormon. Is a Humidor where a man keeps his cigars? I seriously don't know), the white dinky office chair (he's a man people, he wants a real chair), and last but certainly not least, the gnome (what kind of fathers day message does that are in the middle).

If I HAD to buy from Amazon, I would go with the hammock on the second page. Or the robotic lawn mower. I would maybe even entertain the idea of the outdoor food smoker (if the man actually EVER cooked anything in his life).

Since the lawnmower is 800 fat ones and the metal detector is 849 and the flat screen is only 42", I guess I am going to have to go with my first and best idea: vienna sausages.

I try to buy the man some kind of sausage for every holiday and the little metal can will take him right down  memory lane. He was telling the girls just yesterday about when he was a kid he loved his Saturday adventures. He would load up his backpack with everything he needed (food, water, toilet paper) and head out for an adventure on his bike. He would be gone all day looking for abandoned building out in the forest. For some reason that he can't explain, his food always included vienna sausages. Gross.

This year, I am packing a backpack full of vienna sausages and taking the man on an adventure for Father's Day. I might even give him the ultimate gift. I might even eat one of the sausages. Or not.

Or I may have to rethink the whole holiday by shopping at America's true manly man store.

Walmart here I come.

 I would never want to disappoint this man. Look at him. He's the best daddy ever.

This article was first published and filled with useless links as Father's Day Nots on Blogcritics.

Although I was honored for my post to be chosen for publishing, 
I am not sure if I will ever enter another post for their review in the future
as it brought me no hits and it seems that the whole point of Blogcritics
is to use others' writing to shamelessly earn income for themselves.

Thursday, June 09, 2011

I'll Take My Church With Humor

LG doesn't understand why I think this guy is funny, but he couldn't hide his chuckle at The Eye of the Tiger. Lots of Mormons are funny. I recently learned of this funny guy Shaycarl on youtube. He's a Mormon. He's kind of obnoxious. He has four kids. He lives online. Wow, it's like we are long lost twins. Except he is famous and makes his living on youtube and I am only known by my 800 friends on facebook (and only 1/8th of them read my blog) and I don't make any money. But, it's all good, I blog for me. And it's always flattering that anyone actually reads this thing.

Well, you know how I love my church signs. You also know how I love a good laugh. And you know how I get giddy when we combine the two. If you are with me, you must check the link below. It is a great church sign war. And I believe the funny Catholics won.

This is hilarious.

I think that I agree with the Catholics, and not only because they are funny. Rocks will be in heaven because heaven will be here on earth. Why would the rocks have any need to go anywhere else?

Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Funny Dads are best

Check out the dad who dressed up every day of school last year to wave his son off.

He has entertained his son, all the kids on the bus, his neighbors, and a whole lot more via the world wide web.

I am so grateful his wife recorded every single outfit.

This is my kind of guy. Thanks to whoever you are that turned me on to the local Utah County phenomenon by sharing this news article on their facebook.

I looked and laughed at every single picture.

I wish I had ideas as good.

I wish more people in this world could turn away from the wicked stuff and just go back to having a good old time.

My Tennessee influence has to claim this get up the winner of all.

But now that I am in Utah again,
this is a very close second.

I wonder if they played missionary tag that day at school 
in honor of the ultimate funny dad?

Tuesday, June 07, 2011

Radio Turn On Buttons

I just want to share with you the conversation my husband and I shared the other day. I had been chatting with him while he was at work. I was asking him how to view the properties of a picture that I minimized. I couldn't figure out the pixel amount. He told me to make sure the pixel radio was selected.
Me: Pixel Radio. What's that? I see this pixel button, but where does a radio come in?

LG: Oh, they call that button a radio button.
Me: Why?
LG: Because it's like the old-school radio, you can only select one button at a time.
Me: huh?
LG: Don't you remember the old school radio?
Me: faintly.
I got the job done with the help of my personal on-line tech support team. We then got off chat.
I immediately received an e-mail with this photo.
Oh the joy of technology.

I chuckled.
And returned it with this short e-mail:
I am so glad you are finding the time to entertain yourself and enlighten me at the same time. It's a gadget thing.
He then replied back again:
I'm here to serve.

I then said
You make me horny.

He then replied back again:
Easy, I have co-workers walking in and out of my office.

I am glad I can have that effect.

And then he got really risqué with:
Maybe since I sent you a picture to explain what I meant you need to do the same ;-)

I never responded back. And I am not just saying that because his boss may read this someday.

So, fast forward, the other day we were out working in the yard.
There are these metal things sticking up from the concrete patio and they make me nervous that the kids are going to hurt themselves. I finally took matter into my own hands.

"LG, where's the sledgehammer?"

He had no idea. I quickly searched the shed and fetched it.

He was working on some weeds close-by when I came back and took the sledgehammer to the metal.
With two swift swings I had solved the issue.

LG exclaims,
"I now get how that radio e-mail made you horny.
That was most definitely a turn on."

We are so silly.

I love his mind.
He loves my brute strength.

How bliss are we?

Pretty bliss.
We were especially bliss on the day this photo was taken. 
It marked the end of our marriage focusing on higher education for 11 years.
So, we could have more time for the turn on buttons.