Wednesday, February 16, 2005

No Smoke?

Would this sign become obsolete if the world would all convert to smokeless tobacco?

Alright. It is 8:30 am and not much funny has happened yet today. Unless you consider the debate that I just had with my friend's kid about eating Honey Nut Cheerios funny. (I am watching the two older girls of the friend who had baby #3) The kid already ate breakfast before I went and picked her up, but when I gave my daughter, Sophia, some dry cereal in a bowl to snack on while watching cartoons, she wanted some too. So, I gave her the pick from my pantry. She wanted Honey Nut Cheerios. I poured them out into the bowl and handed them to her; for some reason they weren't what she expected. She said, "I don't want that kind." I said,"You just said that you wanted that kind." She said,"No, I didn't." I wanted to say,"Yes, you did", but I refrained from the debate with a two year old, and started back at square one asking her which kind she would really like. She settled on Frosted Mini Wheats. Thank goodness they were aesthetically pleasing when I handed them to her in that Dora the Explorer Bowl. I made a big deal out of the bowl, when I handed it to her, to take the attention off the cereal, of course.

Well, I was just thinking of another one of my brighter moments, and thought that I would share it here. I think it is pretty funny. Shortly after we moved here to Tennessee, I found myself at a semi-professional football game. My brother-in-law Jordan was playing for this team that he called semi-professional, but it seemed like the league was made up of fat old guys that were reliving their high school glory days. Note: (in case he reads this) Jordan wasn't old and he was only a little fat back then.

Well, I found myself in the stands with my husband, kids and in-laws. I was a little shocked that SO many people were smoking in the bleachers. Remember, I am a Western girl. I spent my first 18 years in California and the next 12 in Utah. (both States have clean-air acts) My husband says that in TN many people farm tobacco and a clean air act would never fly. If the amount of people that I see smoking when I am out and about is any kind of indicator, I am sure that my husband is correct. My husband is a native Tennesseean and like anyone else he is extremely defensive of his native land. So, I really wasn't enjoying one of my first TN football experiences because of all the cigarette smoke. If this makes me shallow, sorry, I just do not want my children to die from second hand smoke inhalation.

On with the story, the mother of Jordan's friend was sitting and talking to me. She was so friendly, like most Tennesseean's. There is, for the most part, a breathtaking Southern charm here. During the conversation, I got to complaining about all the smoke and the and my big mouth (a few weeks later, at the only other game I could stand to attend, we walked by her when she was smoking...she totally tried to hide it from me.) Well, this woman, started telling me about her son and the football team and her daughter that was getting married. I asked what her son did for work. She had mentioned that he was taking a break from college. She replied with,"He has a great job, and although it isn't a mother's biggest bragging right...he works for a smokeless tobacco company."

O.k., so here is the funny part. It displays not only my naivity, but my blonde side also. I got all excited and said,"How cool...they make smokeless tobacco." She looked astonished and said, "Oh yes, of course." Now, there was an obvious miscommunication going on. All the time, she was talking about Chewing tobacco (that is the ONLY thing that I had ever heard it called). I thought that the amazing tobacco farmers had come up with some kind of cigarette that could be smoked without giving off any smoke. I was AMAZED and wondered why in the world more Tennesseean's wouldn't use SMOKELESS TOBACCO. Yeah, I know, I am SO funny.


kristy estes-adoff said...

Alice, Just wanted to let you know that I am thoroughly enjoying your posts! I love hearing about your experiences, and how much you are the same Alice I spent my fun high school years with.
We have got to get together soon!
Love, Kristy

Alice said...

Go Lancers!!!!!

Anonymous said...

You should check out the electronic or e-cigarettes ... seeing someone "smoking" one of those in a hospital waiting room is enough to blow most peoples minds.

Anonymous said...

I am fairly sure I shouldn't have pluralized "minds" above. But then again ... some folks seem to be of more than one mind.
Apologies if the apparent crappy grammar offends.

Nicola said...

I just clicked on this one now to read, HA HA! That is a great moment! Really i AM laughing out loud! Thanks! By the way o totally agree with you on the smoke....what boggles my mind even more are the people that smoke in children's playgrounds and parks. I mean seriously? I try and give people dirty looks...but alas it only makes me FEEL better, because they sure don't put it out! Ha!