"You're supposed to"

Last week we took the kids to window toy shop at Target. While I was chatting with a lady from our church, LG stopped at the books with the girls. Bella kept requesting LG to read from different books. At one point LeGrand told Bella to hold on. He was attending to Abigail or Sophia. Bella chimed out in a way that was bound to be noticed, "Dad, it says on the TV you are supposed to read to your children." Classic.

My Christmas Ornaments

 

I have 3 sisters. For the past 7 years we have all been exchanging Christmas ornaments every year. It has been a great way to combine traditions, family and the wifely duty of decorating. It has also been a great way for my sisters to help me with my total hatred for Christmas tree decorating.

This entry will not be funny because I am tired and must retire shortly. I just wanted to post up these pictures and show the variety of ornaments that are on my tree. Forget these people that make them all match. That is serisouly not fun. I will add a little info about each ornament later....too tired. For now, just think of this as my way of making my Christmas decorating pain worth the trouble. You now have all kinds of ideas for different kinds of ornaments you can make.

Santa Claus is Coming To Town

YOU

BETTER

WATCH

OUT!

YOU

BETTER

NOT

CRY!

YOU BETTER NOT POUT.

I'M TELLING YOU WHY.

SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN. So, bring on a mother's work. Here I am trying not to cry yesterday while I was head to toe in elf costume. I really wanted Santa to keep me on his nice list, so I tried really hard to stay happy. I won't dare pout beyond what I have already done in my last entry. Didn't my little elf turn out cute?

The list of things I used from around the house to make this costume include but are not limited to: packing tape, electrical tape, thread, needle, ribbon, newspaper, wire, pom poms, leatherman, feathery boa stuff, a Santa belt, a dress from younger sister, handed down boots (passed down just in time from cousin Kearan), and last but certainly not least - an old hat that I made in High School to go with some pj's from a Christmas pajama party dance.

The inspiration for the costume of the year came from google and the cover of one of our favorite movies, Elf. We watch this movie all year; it is so funny and pretty wholesome. (it is hard to find both innocence and humor in the same world) The only two items I ended up buying for the costume were the elf ears, which are not included in this picture, and the white tights, which Abigail needed for church anyway. Pretty good huh?

Do you think I redeemed myself from last year? Here is Abigail's sparrow costume from her last year's performance.

I know, I know, what was I thinking? The poor girl had to sqwack around on stage like this. The best compliment of the night came from one of Abigail's best friend's father. Ryan's dad, Matt, has a pretty good sense of humor. He said, "Abigail you were the best tropical sparrow I have ever seen." SO FUNNY!

Skipping Christmas

 

Call me Scrooge, but I hate putting up the Christmas tree. Yes, of course, I am always happy when it is done and we are greeted by twinking lights in our living room for a whole month! (two, if I never get around to taking it down in January) But, c'mon what sadistic Martha Stewart came up with the tradition of putting away every knick knack in your house just to unload 6 huge boxes of junk. Is this really a necessary part of enjoying the holidays?

One of these days I will get the courage up to skip Christmas as I read about in John Grisham's book.

Here is a picture of LG enjoying his Thanksgiving holiday. I am not trying to make him feel bad; I really am glad that he was enjoying some down time.



But, shouldn't we all be able to enjoy our holidays, regardless of our gender?

We need an ACLU Christmas. We need to keep all of our National Holidays, yet, the week after we celebrate, we should have the ACLU version where the men do all the work that the women usually handle and the women act like the men (ie. sitting on the couch reading a book, playing football with our friends, watching sports on TV)

Think about it. Who does the work? We'll start with Easter for the pure delight of making a point. Who buys the candy, who shops for those cute Easter outfits? Who makes sure that they get up at the crack of dawn to stage the fact that the Easter Bunny has visited (Abigail does read my blog now and so I have to be careful what I say here - I know she doesn't believe in the Easter Bunny any more)

Next holiday - July 4th - Who buys and prepares the food and plans the outing? Really, all the men have to do is set off the fireworks..and is that really work?

Halloween - Who buys the candy, who tries to keep everyone from consuming the candy when you bought it the week earlier? Who makes the costumes? Who runs around like a mad woman on 10/31 making sure that all the preparations are accomplished for trick or treating, including the dinner, and making sure that you can somewhat tell what the kids are dressed up as, even under their coats?

Thanksgiving - who combs all the adds looking for the cheapest turkey? Who bakes the pies and the rolls and the, do you really want me to finish the food list? Who has to clean the house like a turkey with her head cut off to accomidate all the company? And, who is that actually sets that darn table? If all of that isn't enough. Now, in American culture, we are expected to get up at the crack of dawn the day after Thanksgiving to make sure we get the best deals for the next holiday coming up.

and Christmas ... I don't think I have to explain the thought process.

I think I would really be willing to give up the two Woman holidays of the year (Valentine's and Mother's Day) to eliminate all the other holiday work throughout the year.

I know, I know, I am a whiner. It's all about the memories we are making. I can't help it that I prefer to make memories without working myself like a horse.

Not that you care, but I really wanted to add a picture of me in here of decorating the tree last night. Guess why I didn't? I spared you the trauma of staring at my big fat bum. Every picture that was taken I was leaning over and picking something up, moving furniture, or plugging something in. Yep, you got it....working.

And were you wondering what LG was doing through all of the Christmas festivities - you got it - not working - unless you consider taking my picture work - which come to think of it - maybe he was working - staring at my bum really can't be considered enjoyable. HAPPY HOLIDAYS EVERYONE!

Oh, and I just added the bonus picture of Kitty Bear. I think she may feel like I do about this whole tree nonsense. Check her out; she's staring it down.

Read the Box

 

Here are some pictures of the Fruity Pebbles that the kids left behind on the carpet after Saturday morning cartoons. For those of you that are unschooled in the fine art of cereal, Fruity Pebbles are some of the smallest pieces of cereal that one can buy. For that reason, I guess I can't be too angry that the girls spilled a few. Besides, all it takes is a vacuum to clean this one up. That is nothing compared to a lot of the other things that I clean up around here (like 1 cup of hot cocoa that toppled all over my pile of clean dishes this morning - I have a hard time with my coordination early in the morning)

So, do you read the box of cereal while eating in the morning? I used to, but rarely take the time anymore. This probably has to do with the fact that I rarely eat cereal, much less the stuff that actually has interesting packaging. What a sad part of growing older: we have to pay more attention to the Nutrition Guide than the free crossword puzzle, not to mention the good toy you sometimes find inside the box. Have you noticed that they have a lot fewer toys in cereal boxes than they used to?

I made a new blogging friend, thanks to LG's cousin Missy. Her last post talked about only having shredded wheat cereal while she was growing up. It made me laugh. I could totally relate. I grew up, like my new friend, poor. We would occasionally get the good cereal, but mostly we just had the yucky stuff too. You know: Cheerios, shredded wheat, and the part that I thought was so funny: puffed wheat. Who eats that stuff? You can't even buy it in the box. You have to purchase puffed wheat in all its glory - packaged in one of those budget saving bags.

I commented on my friends blog that I really thought it was awesome when my mom occasionally upgraded to the Sugar Coated Puffed Wheat. I guess that my past cereal experience explains my need to keep good and tasty cereals in my cupboard. Seriously, I have at least 10 kinds of cereal at all times. I really need cereal therapy. I remember being horrified when some family told me that every Christmas the mother let her kids pick out their favorite sugar cereal. C'mon, do you really think a child can make their favorite cereal last for a whole year. At my house growing up my brothers would have eaten it all before I ever got back for my second bowl. I guess we have Christmas here every Saturday. Saturdays were made for sugar cereal, don't you think?

I love to feed my kids cereal. One of the only things I enjoy about LG being out of town is that I don't have to cook. If he is gone for a week at a time, you bet your bottom dollar that we will be eating cereal at least 5 times, 2 of those being as a replacement for dinner.

So what am I trying to do with this entry? I am not totally sure. I am mostly just rambling and I am sure that this won't make you laugh. But maybe if you slow down some Saturday and take some time to have some sugar cereal and read the box, that might make you laugh. Especially if you do it in your underwear like my brother David always did when we were growing up. That's no joke. Every Saturday, I would wake up to David sitting two feet from the TV, wearing underwear only, wrapped in a blanket, with a gallon of milk, a box of cereal and the biggest bowl and spoon he could find. I guess he read the box during the commercials.

Google is my friend

Have you ever tried to "google" yourself? Laugh if you must, but I do it all the time. Sadly, Alice Gold never brings up anything to do with me. Interestingly there are many other Alice Gold's in this country. Also interesting is that they all seem pretty accomplished. A third interesting note is that my mother-in-law is also Alice Gold. She goes by her middle name Faye, but unfortunate for her she doesn't show up in google either.

So, when searching the engine for Alice Gold got old, I adopted a new favorite pasttime. Now, about once a week I will google "imsofunny". Today I was absolutely elated when I showed up in the #2 spot. Man, I can't believe that I am almost the famous writer that I have been dreaming about for so long. That was facetiousness, in case my naysayer anonymous commenter is reading. (and, yes I do know what facetious means, as well as budget conscience) It is amazing what one can find searching on the internet. One of my previous posts shows a funny find on Ask Jeeves. This search was in reference to one of my most liked entries: Cialis.

I cannot imagine life without google. LeGrand spent years trying to convince me that we needed to upgrade from dial-up to DSL. I always resisted! (Yes, this was before my blogging days) Well, now, occasionally when we go over our budget,(which unfortunate for me we have been doing a lot of lately) LG and I will discuss places we can cut back.

Now, the tables have turned and LG will sometimes suggest cutting out the DSL. I am dumbfounded that he really thinks he can live without fast Internet at home because you know we are NEVER going back to dial-up. Lucky for me, I made a very smart deal with LeGrand before I embraced modern technology. Before I got my DSL or my cell phone I warned him that I would be unable to go back. One point for me in the spousal war...it was as if I knew he would try to renege the offer. HA! I love unwritten contracts. He can never take away my cell phone or my DSL because I refused to get them without him promising that he wouldn't renege.

So, what am I going to do on the computer next? Search for an elf costume for Abigail's school play on Thursday. How did my mother take care of stuff like this in the old days? Can you believe that I actually went and sat at Hobby Lobby looking for a costume pattern today? What was I thinking? I just got on the information superhighway (whatever it is that Nadelie calls the internet) and found what I needed to do in 1 minute flat. Every second spared when you are a mother = one second to do something a little more enjoyable (like blogging). And, a good side note. I just saved us $40 on an elf costume. I'll have to tell LG that the DSL paid for itself this month. He will be so happy.

Next blogging topic: mapquest.