Sisters

My sisters and I got to share some moments together recently.

Sisters are the best thing EVER.

Three of us peed our pants multiple times from laughing so hard.

(I'll let you guess which ones did the peeing.

I have been told that not everyone wants to share their life story.)

The joys of the incompetent bladder: something only a sister can understand.

Luckily we were out on a jet ski & only had to jump in the water to clean up.

Here is an e-mail forward that I read yesterday. I found it strikingly true.

A young wife sat on a sofa on a hot humid day, drinking iced tea and visiting with her Mother. As they talked about life, about marriage, about the responsibilities of life and the obligations of adulthood, the mother clinked the ice cubes in her glass thoughtfully and turned a clear, sober glance upon her daughter

'Don't forget your Sisters,' she advised, swirling the tea leaves to the bottom of her glass. 'They'll be more important as you get older. No matter how much you love your husband, no matter how much you love the children you may have, you are still going to need Sisters. Remember to go places with them now and then; do things with them.'

'Remember that 'Sisters' means ALL the women... your girlfriends, your daughters, and all your other women relatives too. 'You'll need other women. Women always do.'

What a funny piece of advice!' the young woman thought. Haven't I just gotten married? Haven't I just joined the couple-world? I'm now a married woman, for goodness sake! A grownup! Surely my husband and the family we may start will be all I need to make my life worthwhile!'

But she listened to her Mother. She kept contact with her Sisters and made more women friends each year. As the years tumbled by, one after another, she gradually came to understand that her Mom really knew what she was talking about. As time and nature work their changes and their mysteries upon a woman, Sisters are the mainstays of her life.

Time passes.

Life happens.

Distance separates.

Children grow up.

Jobs come and go.

Love waxes and wanes.

Men don't do what they're supposed to do.

Hearts break.

Parents die.

Colleagues forget favours.

Careers end.

BUT.........

Sisters are there, no matter how much time and how many miles are between you. A girl friend is never farther away than needing her can reach. When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have to walk it by yourself, the women in your life will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end.

Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you...Or come in and carry you out.
Girlfriends, daughters, granddaughters, daughters-in-law, sisters, sisters-in-law, Mothers,
Grandmothers, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family, all bless our life!

The world wouldn't be the same without women, and neither would I. When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead. Nor did we know how much we would need each other.

Seeing things?

After watching this:

For some crazy reason my husband thinks that this mother of three can go from being a Soccer Mom/PTSO secretary to the Vice President of the country in about ten years?

I do have vision, but c'mon....politics?

If it were up to me, I think we would have no government at all.

I am very happy with two things.

1- The respect that mothers finally seem to be getting in this country is amazing!
And, 2- the fact that my husband thinks that I should be a part of it.

And the 2nd reason makes me happy for an additional two reasons:

1- He thinks I am smart enough (or dumb enough)

And 2- he wants me to have MORE POWER!!

Yahoo to that.

I am so glad to be a part of this new stay home mom turns power politician revolution.

Even if it's only in my hubby's dream world.

Besides, I don't think I would make it as a politician.

I am sure I would overspend,

and it would mostly be on school supplies that were 75% off.

No school could ever have enough crayons or pencil sharpeners, could they?

If you want to really see something: go here,
and make sure you tell me what you think.

The Playground back in Old School

I had one of the best walks down memory road recently at a little park in Sayre, OK.

(I think that is the right state)

When we stopped to eat at a very retro park close to the interstate,

I just had to take pictures!

When would I ever see playground equipment like this again?

There must not be a single lawyer in this little country town.

I can't believe that playground equipment like this is still in existence,

much less, actually STILL in a park.

If it wasn't 110 degrees outside, I would have INSISTED my kids take a try on that slide.

Those were the days, weren't they...you know, the ones when it was fun to go to the park and brave the safety hazards....oh man, old school, when are you coming back to us?

Dear Sir South,

Dear Sir South,

Do you think you could do me, your favorite Western transplant, a favor?

Can you please invite some of my favorite features of Western living

to come and visit from time to time?

I would be much obliged, sir.

I just can't be taking 2,000 mile trips whenever I need a fixin'.

I know I ought not complain, but I so miss things from my native land.

I love the you with most of my heart now.

And, I surprised even myself that I missed some things about you while I was away.

But, there are just so many joys of life that are absent here.

I don't think it would be a terrible crime to let some of those things in.

For instance,

I know this Jack in the Box looks scary,

but what harm could he really do while he driving that convertible

and cooking me up some 2 tacos for 99 cents at the same time?

And, I know we have as many icees as we could ever want,

but don't you think it is time they had a little competition?

I think that some slurpees from 7-11 would be the perfect threat/compliment

to our only two flavors: coke and cherry.

Besides I am a Mormon and I can't even drink the coke flavor.

And that cherry stuff is getting a little old.

It's as if you've never heard of the flavors pina colada or orange or grape or

Mountain Dew or Dr Pepper or berry or

.....well, I am sure that you are getting the picture.

This is called real Mexican food.

It is a slice of heaven.

You have not tasted the perfection of combined flavors

until you have tried this mix of pineapple and shrimp!

I know we have some Mexicans living here...

don't you think we could sneak them some recipes

and give them a loan to help them open up shop?

Western Bacon Cheeseburgers....I guess they will have to stay in the West.

Boo hoo.

This is called a covered bus stop.

I know I NEVER ride the bus, so this seems like an odd request, but

it just makes me feel better to see people have a nice comfortable shelter while they wait.

I'm not even going to mention the sidewalk

because you already know how I feel about its absence here.

This is what we call red clay. It's beautiful in its own way.

A cactus. This is the one thing that I really don't have to have.

I just thought that I would add it in for a good measure.

I know that we have a Waffle House,

but do you think that they could somehow hire my dad

and pay him enough to actually make him move out here.

I just love his fried eggs and toast.

Thank you sir.

You know where to find me.

I will anxiously be awaiting your reply.

Alice Gold

Ward Star Search

On Saturday evening,
the Gold family won the "Funniest" prize at our church talent show.

I think people just voted out of a sense of duty.

After all, I am the only ward member with a blog named imsofunny.

It really wasn't that funny.

But isn't Litte Miss Goldilocks so darling?

If I can ever get LG to actually finish the movie and download it,

I will share it at a later date.

It's pretty entertaining, in a bad sort of way.

But, I have to say that for me the most entertaining part of the night was when the Bishop transformed from a daytime attorney to the SuperBishop at night.

He was wearing two suits....one over the top of the other.

He took his top one off.

Yeah, a Bishop taking his pants off in front of his whole congregation

is something that I hope to NEVER see again!

But, the shock factor worked. We all had to laugh out of pure horror.

Ten Virgins with Children

No, it wasn't immaculate. It was a church play. It was fun.

Guess who was the one with the real Pashmina?

Yeah, that would be me.

A few years back, my sister, Shannon, brought it back for me from Italy.

I told her how beautiful it was and kindly thanked her.
I thought to myself, "When is simple old me ever going to wear something so elegant?"

"It's a darn scarf. I am never going to wear a scarf!

Why couldn't she bring me some wine?"

(not really, because you all know I can't drink that)

So, I tucked the soft and pretty scarf away for a completely improbable day in the future when I would magically transform into a woman with some taste.

Shannon's husband has schooled her in the ways of refinement.

I was not so lucky.

I had to teach my husband to match the color of his shoes to his belt.

And that there are some occasions besides church that it is appropriate to wear something other than jeans or basketball shorts, and a T-shirt.

I grew up in a beach town and LG grew up in a County school in Tennessee.

So, you can imagine that when it comes to the subject of fashion,

we are both somewhat challenged.

But, wow, last week,

I got to pretend that this mother of 3 was not only a virgin,

but that I was also the coolest woman in the play.

You see, I had a real Pashmina.

I felt like a million bucks as the other virgins salivated in envy.

On the way home, I promptly called my sister to give her the much delayed appropriate thanks. You know the kind where there is almost groveling involved.

I somehow had to make up for my lack of excitement from my first little thanks.
I told her, "There's nothing like the jealousy of another woman to make you want to have a little more culture in your life."

I have to tell you that, for me, the sense of belonging to the high life was fleeting.

As soon as I got home, the scarf went right back in the bottom of my drawer.

We wouldn't want my kids to find it, would we?

It may somehow end up in their dress up box

with the fluffy elf costume and Styrofoam knight's armor.

Now, all I can do is hope that our church Christmas party

will be the kind that we all dress up and go back to Jerusalem.

I would love to have a chance to NOT gloat.

Now that I know what a Pashmina is,

I may be able to sensor my pride and play it off,

instead of rubbing it in the face of commoners.

NO HOT DOGS!!!

How in the world do they ever expect to make a profit?

Everyone wants a hot dog while they wait for their brake work.

On the other side of the sign, it reads:

No beer.

No lottery.

No hot dogs.

Being a good Christian, I understand the no beer and no lottery thing.

But hot dogs...isn't that supposed to be safe for Christians?

Since when do we have to have a Kosher diet?

School Shooting in Knoxville

I had chosen not to post about the school shooting because it is just depressing and that is not the purpose of my blog.

We personally had several of our friends in attendance at Central High School during the shooting this past week. One of our very close friends was running late and her son was very very fortunate for missing it all together, or he could have very well witnessed everything and needed therapy for the rest of his life.

I changed my mind as the dialogue going on over at almostgotit and it has motivated me to invite you in for some discussion. The past several posts over there have been very thought provoking and are encouraging me to take more action to assist our schools.

Does anyone have any suggestions of what I can do personally? I am already a classroom volunteer, room parent, PTSO member and a parent of really good parents who mentors not only my own children, but their friends and many others at church and in the community?

I have done all of those things for a long time, but when we switched our kids from their last inner city school, I took it as a personal failure. LG and I had failed to make a difference there. We were more than happy to take our precious children elsewhere and they are thriving at a new school with a truly safe and positive climate.

Besides spreading true Christianity, what else can we do to stop our schools from being overrun by characterless children?

GM vs. Microsoft

I recently got this e-mail forwarded to me.

Snopes has indicated it isn't a real press release.

Nonetheless, it's still fun to read.

So, here you go.

For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on. At a recent computer expo (COMDEX),Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, 'If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon.'

In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:

If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part ):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash........ Twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation' warning light.< /SPAN>
7. The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine off
PS - I'd like to add that when all else fails, you could call 'customer service' in some foreign country and be instructed in some foreign language how to fix your car yourself!!!!

Nick Pitera

Cheryl sent me a YouTube video of this Nick Pitera singing.

In the video she sent to me, I was trying to figure out if he was lip syncing because his voice was unbelievably HIGH and good!

Then I found this recording where he showcases his a little more than mediocre man voice and his amazing woman voice. If you don't want to watch the whole thing, fast forward to about 50 seconds into it and listen to his man for about 10 seconds and then he will go into the female part.

It's just crazy. My girls and their friend Emma have been freaking out all morning.

This gives me a little understanding into my husband's voice. I've always teased him that he is stuck in primary because he can sing the melody of any song almost perfectly when he sings it in a high soprano, but he has never really mastered singing in the lower register. Maybe I should just start letting him sing the woman part and I can sing the man one. My voice is getting lower every day!

My vote is in for Nick Pitera to record for the next Disney princess? What do you think?

Off to school

Last week marked the beginning of another school year for the Gold Family.

It is a little historic for us, as Bella, our baby, finally gets to go along with her sisters.

So, now I am left filling my days without children in tow.

I think that this Wild Thing will be o.k.

When I started getting a bit sad, I decided I needed to embrace the change.

I gave myself a treat on the first day of my new found freedom.

I went to Panera Bread and got whatever I wanted.

I sat and ate and read my book just to make sure I could still enjoy some quiet.

I sure hope the girls enjoy school as much as I enjoyed my date with myself.

I also hope that they will find and be the kind of friend that is illustrated in the following story by Susie. And, they will always remember that prayers are answered.

Bella can attest to prayers being answered herself. All summer, Bella repeatedly told us she wanted Mrs. Nitz, and we told her that any teacher would be just fine and that she wasn't going to get to choose. It ended up that she had been assigned a teacher other than Mrs. Nitz, the one Sophia had last year. Bella was bummed out during the first week of assessments, but didn't complain. She just kept on saying, "I really really really want Mrs. Nitz." To our pleasant surprise, when Bella reported to her second day of school, Mrs. Nitz was waiting. Bella had been changed to her class. You should have seen that smile of an answered prayer.

WET PANTS

Come with me to a third grade classroom.....

There is a nine-year-old kid sitting at his desk and all of a sudden, there is a puddle between his feet and the front of his pants are wet. He thinks his heart is going to stop because he cannot possibly imagine how this has happened. It's never happened before, and he knows that when the boys find out he will never hear the end of it. When the girls find out, they'll never speak to him again as long as he lives. The boy believes his heart is going to stop; he puts his head down and prays this prayer, 'Dear God, this is an emergency! I need help now! Five minutes from now I'm dead meat.'

He looks up from his prayer and here comes the teacher with a look in her eyes that says he has been discovered. As the teacher is walking toward him, a classmate named Susie is carrying a goldfish bowl that is filled with water. Susie trips in front of the teacher and inexplicably dumps the bowl of water in the boy's lap. The boy pretends to be angry, but all the while is saying to himself, 'Thank you, Lord! Thank you, Lord!'

Now all of a sudden, instead of being the object of ridicule, the boy is the object of sympathy.. The teacher rushes him downstairs and gives him gym shorts to put on while his pants dry out. All the other children are on their hands and knees cleaning up around his desk. The sympathy is wonderful. But as life would have it, the ridicule that should have been his has been transferred to someone else - Susie.

She tries to help, but they tell her to get out. You've done enough, you klutz!'
Finally, at the end of the day, as they are waiting for the bus, the boy walks over to Susie and whispers, 'You did that on purpose, didn't you?' Susie whispers back, 'I wet my pants once too.'

Goodnight Sweet Pup

My sister Renee had ten puppies while we were out in Utah.
They were a huge hit with all of the kids.

Speaking of puppies, I am calling all animal lovers and big burly man lovers!

This Youtube video is so so sweet.
Thanks to Valerie for the informative e-mail.

Crafty Friends...

...are the best!

Cally created this.

Go to her blog to see all of the other amazing things that she can do.

I almost died when there was something just for me on her blog.

Who knew blogging friends were so good at surprises?

I cannot wait to get my hands on the original.

Friends do get a good discount, right?

I must say that I am so happy to have finally found something that

really portrays just how cute my girls really are.

And, as if this wasn't enough.

Look at what came in the mail today.

Kristen made up this sweetest piece of recreated children's art.

She mentioned this medium on her blog in reference to my post about Bella's art.

Kristen also has a crafty blog.

This is just so beautiful. It reminds me of something that I would find at Cally's house.

Neener, neener. neener Cally, you will have to make your own.

I love being surprised. It doesn't happen often.

Thanks for thinking of us girls.

You have both motivated me to decorate the girls' room for the first time in their lives.

Now all I have to do is wait for Valerie to sew those bedspreads.

Would anyone like to offer to paint and/or make some curtains?

Really, thank you so much Cally and Kristen.

I am absolutely speechless. And you know that never happens to me.

Hypocrites

Mom, what is that word that means you tell people to do one thing, but then you don't do what you say to do?

Hypocrite.

Oh yeah, hypocrite.

So, if you tell us to wear our seat belts and you don't, then you're a hypocrite?

I guess you could say that.

Fast forward a week to this morning. (and I apologize to those of you who may not get the referenced Harry Potter magical creature)

Kids, please put your seat belts on.

Mom, you are such a hippogriff, put your seat belt on!

Oh, it was time for a little lesson while I shrugishly pulled on my seat belt.

It's not nice to call people hypocrites, Abigail, and I am not a hypocrite, I just forget to put my seat belt on sometimes.

And it's not nice to call people hippogriffs either.

Vast Mormon Conspiracy

I was reading a friend's blog this morning and found this about the Mormon Conspiracy. I thought it was worth the time of my readers. Check it out, if you want.

Native American Cuisine

In the West there is something called a Navajo Taco. For lack of a better description, it is kind of a mix between a taco, a Pita sandwich, and a scone. And even though I somehow just managed to make them sound very scary, Navajo Tacos are very good and filling. We are sad that we haven't eaten one in years. We have only Petro's in the south. I suppose that is as close as we get to a Native American Cuisine. I guess all the Confederates scared all the Natives away long ago.

Well, as part of our trip out west, it was our goal to eat every Western cuisine that we miss while living in the South. We hadn't really mentioned a Navajo taco, but whenever we saw a place that offered anything we can only get out West we stopped. We were constantly on the lookout for our favorites. (remembered or not)

After spending a day at The Grand Canyon, we immediately got on the road. We were in a hurry to get to my mom and dads. We had not eaten lunch and were starving, but figured we would see something on the way and would save time by eating in the car. We wrongly suspected we could find food on the road cheaper than we could in the Canyon. We ended up bi passing the only little town that would have anything to eat, and gassed up in the middle of nowhere. The trip turned into hours and we were well into dinner time.

The only thing we passed on the road were these Navajo Shops where the Native American tribe members sell their jewelry, pottery and such. There was a new shop about every 10 miles. They all looked exactly the same and seemed to market and sell the exact same items.

Now I know you all already realize that LG has an MBA and is always looking for good business opportunities. We were all getting hungrier and crankier by the second. Finally LG turned to me and in desperation exclaimed, "You would think that some of these Navajos would start selling some tacos."

And, that, ladies and gentlemen, gives you the quick wit I live with on a daily basis. LG needs to start his own blog that features his humor. He's so much funnier than I could ever hope to be. I am so happy to have a husband that has never let me down on his promise to make me laugh every day.

A Message from Haley

Here is a precious shot of my new niece.

I guess she is going to be a peacemaker.

Bucket List

Added 3.28.11 Every day I get a lot of hits to this post from search engines. I just want to steer you in the direction to sharebuckets. It is a cool site where you can write, edit, and track your bucket list as well as sharing ideas with other users. Too cool not to share.

LG and I watched the movie The Bucket List a while back.

It was a great reason to search myself. What MUST I do before I die?

I have been pondering the question. I haven't written my bucket list yet.

Here are some funny bucket list ideas I want to add to mine.

1. Name one of my children after the place they were conceived, preferably Vegas.

2. Get on a JumboTron by doing something stupid.

3. Take someone's clothes away from a public shower, and leave them with only a funny costume to wear.

4. Somehow get one of the messages written to me in my High School yearbooks published.

5. Spontaneously break out into a rockin' rendition of The Wheels on the Bus while riding public transportation..of course change the lyrics to shed light on the type of passengers who ride.

6. Interview a Wal-Mart greeter as if I want to put him in a paper for his life accomplishments. Send the write-up to my local paper because you know it will end up way interesting. Everyone has a story.

7. Hang lots of different fun pairs of shoes from the phone wire in my front yard. Preferably in an array of colors.

8. Get on The Today Show and pick my nose.

9. Ask for different color nailpolish on all ten toes every time I get a pedicure.

10. Go nuts while playing minigolf, every time I sink a putt.

(these are weak...c'mon, give me some better ideas)

Funny things I have already marked off are:

1. Just inviting up 2 people from a church congregation to sing a musical number...act like they already had it planned.

2. Rollerblade to work on Halloween in my bathrobe.

3. Kiss a complete stranger on the street. And make it a good kiss.

4. Crank call someone famous.

5. Party line a friend and talk bad about them to another friend while acting like you can't hear them and are unaware they are on the phone. (this one is kind of mean)

6. Glue quarters to a street in the crosswalk and photograph people who pick them up.

7. As a teenager, I told my mom that I was pregnant in all seriousness, and let her believe it for a few hours.

8. Play bob for goldfish, swallow a goldfish whole. (I cannot believe I did this one)

9. Hijack a local radio station and tell the audience that you are kidnapping the DJ until you gives you the concert tickets.

10. Go to the Rose Parade and ask one of the old dudes to let you ride on the back of his motorcycle. It is especially fun when the guy's name is Fast Eddie.

11. Go up to local hunters in their hunting garb and thank them for their service to their country. ( I recently made a fool of myself when mistaking hunting camo for the real thing. oops)

After finding the following list, I think I am living with a whole lot more excitement then I ever thought I could have experienced and this young age of 35.

So, good for me. And, bad for me....I still have so many things to check off that darn list.

Now, who still wants to go bungee jumping?

(I 've starred everything I have already done.)

1. Touched an iceberg* (and stood on one floating in the ocean)
2. Slept under the stars*
3. Been a part of a hockey fight
4. Changed a baby's diaper*
5. Watched a meteor shower*
6. Given more than you can afford to charity*
7. Swam with wild dolphins*
8. Climbed a mountain*
9. Held a tarantula*
10. Said "I love you" and meant it*
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a lightning storm at sea
14. Stayed up all night long and watched the sun rise*
15. Seen the Northern Lights
16. Gone to a huge sports game *
17. Walked the stairs to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown and eaten your own vegetables*
19. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope*
20. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment*
21. Had a pillow fight* (I may have to disagree with this...is there really a worst time...everyone should laugh more often)
22. Bet on a winning horse
23. Taken a sick day when you're not ill*
24. Built a snow fort*
25. Held a lamb*
26. Gone skinny dipping*
27. Taken an ice cold bath*
28. Had a meaningful conversation with a beggar*
29. Seen a total eclipse*
30. Ridden a roller coaster*
31. Hit a home run*
32. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking*
33. Adopted an accent for fun* (it has never been that good though)
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors*
35. Felt very happy about your life, even for just a moment*
36. Loved your job 90% of the time*
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied*
38. Watched wild whales*
39. Gone rock climbing* (does a wall count)
40. Gone on a midnight walk on the beach*
41. Gone sky diving
42. Visited Ireland
43. Ever bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant*
44. Visited India
45. Bench-pressed your own weight*
46. Milked a cow*
47. Alphabetized your personal files*
48. Ever worn a superhero costume*
49. Sung karaoke*
50. Lounged around in bed all day*
51. Gone scuba diving* (sort of -came back up very quick)
52. Kissed in the rain*
53. Played in the mud*
54. Gone to a drive-in theater*
55. Done something you should regret, but don't*
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business*
58. Taken a martial arts class*
59. Been in a movie*
60. Gone without food for 3 days* (not willingly)
61. Made cookies from scratch*
62. Won first prize in a costume contest
63. Got flowers for no reason*
64. Been in a combat zone
65. Spoken more than one language fluently
66. Gotten into a fight while attempting to defend someone
67. Bounced a check*
68. Read - and understood - your credit report*
69. Recently bought and played with a favorite childhood toy*
70. Found out something significant that your ancestors did
71. Called or written your Congress person*
72. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over*
73. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge*
74. Helped an animal give birth
75. Been fired or laid off from a job
76. Won money* (Bunko)
77. Broken a bone* (the doctor did it for me)
78. Ridden a motorcycle* (ran into our front door)
79. Driven any land vehicle at a speed of greater than 100 mph*
80. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon
81. Slept through an entire flight: takeoff, flight, and landing
82. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days
83. Eaten sushi*
84. Had your picture in the newspaper*
85. Read The Bible cover to cover (I'm not sure, can't remember, I had the goal on my mission but I read so many scriptures then I can't remember if I actually read the whole thing - I think if I had, I would remember it)
86. Changed someone's mind about something you care deeply about*
87. Gotten someone fired for their actions
88. Gone back to school*
89. Changed your name*
90. Caught a fly in the air with your bare hands
91. Eaten fried green tomatoes*
92. Read The Iliad
93. Taught yourself an art from scratch*
94. Killed and prepared an animal for eating* (does fish count?)
95. Apologized to someone years after inflicting the hurt*(I think I am a pro at this)
96. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language*
97. Been elected to public office (does school council count?)
98. Thought to yourself that you're living your dream*
99. Had to put someone you love into hospice care
100. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn't know you
101. Had a booth at a street fair
102. Dyed your hair*
103. Been a DJ*
104. Rocked a baby to sleep*
105. Dropped a cat from a high place to see if it really lands on all fours
106. Raked your carpet
107. Brought out the best in people*
108. Brought out the worst in people*
109. Worn a mood ring*
110. Ridden a horse*
111. Carved an animal from a piece of wood or bar of soap*
112. Cooked a dish where four people asked for the recipe*
113. Buried a child
114. Gone to a Broadway* (does a traveling Broadway count - I saw Phantom in LA with that main guy, can't remember his name)
115. Been inside the pyramids
116. Shot a basketball into a basket*
117. Danced at a disco*(does rollerskating count)
118. Played in a band*
119. Shot a bird* (with my finger)
120. Gone to an arboretum*
121. Tutored someone*
122. Ridden a train*
123. Brought an old fad back into style*
124. Eaten caviar*
125. Let a salesman talk you into something you didn’t need*
126. Ridden a giraffe or elephant*
127. Published a book (I wish)
128. Pieced a quilt
129.Lived in an historic place*
130. Acted in a play or performed on a stage*
131. Asked for a raise*
132. Made a hole-in-one
133. Gone deep sea fishing*
134. Gone roller skating*
135. Run a marathon
136. Learned to surf* (does getting up for 3 seconds count)
137. Invented something* (In my mind, if I could actually make a prototype I am convinced it would make million -I'm just not technically inclined)
138. Flown first class
139. Spent the night in a 5-star luxury suite* (does a resort count?)
140. Flown in a helicopter
141. Visited Africa
142. Sang a solo*
143. Gone spelunking (don't know what that is?)
144. Learned how to take a compliment*
145. Written a love-story
146. Seen Michelangelo’s David* (the knock off in some casino in Las Vegas)
147. Had your portrait painted* (does sketched count?)
148. Written a fan letter*
149. Spent the night in something haunted
150. Owned a St. Bernard or Great Dane
151. Ran away*
152. Learned to juggle*
153. Been a boss (does it count that I always feel like I am in charge?)
154. Sat on a jury
155. Lied about your weight*
156. Gone on a diet*
157. Found an arrowhead or a gold nugget* (do the fake ones count)
158. Written a poem*
159. Carried your lunch in a lunchbox*
160. Gotten food poisoning
161. Gone on a service, humanitarian or religious mission*
162. Hiked the Grand Canyon*
163. Sat on a park bench and fed the ducks*
164. Gone to the opera
165. Gotten a letter from someone famous
166. Worn knickers*
167. Ridden in a limousine*
168. Attended the Olympics* (do the Olympic sights and Today Show count?)
169. Can hula or waltz* (I learned a little hula when I was younger)
170. Read a half dozen Nancy Drew or Hardy Boys books
171. Been stuck in an elevator
172. Had a revelatory dream*
173. Thought you might crash in an airplane*
174. Had a song dedicated to you on the radio or at a concert*
175. Saved someone’s life* (do all those blood donations and depression med talks count?)
176. Eaten raw whale (how about shark?)
177. Know how to tat, smock or do needlepoint*
178. Laughed till your side hurt*
179. Straddled the equator
180. Taken a photograph of something other than people that is worth framing*
181. Gone to a Shakespeare Festival
182. Sent a message in a bottle*
183. Spent the night in a hostel (but I think some of the scary hotels should count)
184. Been a cashier*
185. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
186. Joined a union*
187. Donated blood or plasma*
188. Built a campfire*
189. Kept a blog*
190. Had hives
191. Worn custom made shoes or boots
192. Made a PowerPoint presentation*
193. Taken a Hunter’s Safety Course
194. Served at a soup kitchen*
195. Conquered the Rubik’s cube*(does peeling the stickers or taking it apart count?)
196. Know CPR*
197. Ridden in or owned a convertible*
198. Found a long lost friend*
199. Helped solve a crime
Now I need to get writing my own list. I can only think of a few for now.

1. Hike down the Grand Canyon.

2. Write and publish a book.

3. Visit the Polynesian Cultural Center in Hawaii.

4. Go to NYC and see at least 5 broadway musicals.

5. Earn at least my Bachelor's Degree.

6. Get back in shape and be able to run a mile in under 8 minutes again.

7. See every State in the Union.

8. Learn to speak Spanish fluently.

9. Go on a mission with my husband.

10. Go sky diving.

11.Give away a lot of money.

Here's to living long enough to get it all done.

If you got any great ideas from this post,
please take a moment and click the facebook like button
on the right sidebar. Thanks.

Oxymoronish - Yeah, I just made that word up

Does anyone else see anything wrong with this billboard?

Isn't it a little oxymoronish?

I mean to give out a prescription to get rid of your addiction.

Is giving out the drugs the best way to treat this ailment?

Run chicken run, In memorium

I have found a lot of joy watching Valerie's chickens grow up.

The joy ended today.


Valerie called just to share her depression with a fellow chicken lover.


Two stray dogs came and tortured or ate all of our grown babies while they were home alone today.


I feel like I am stuck emotionally in a chicken holocaust.

Not to mention the loss of the future farm fresh eggs.

The chickens just didn't stand a chance.


Especially since Big Mama who ended up being Big Papa had already been eaten by the humans.

God bless Valerie while she cleans up the feathers.

And every time in the future she hears the joke that begins with "why did the chicken cross the road", she won't be able to stop herself....

"to run away from those mean dogs."

Youth Ministers

I recently read this post about some local youth ministers being charged with the sexual misconduct towards the girls they had been entrusted to minister.

I just couldn't help but think about something our Bishop recently said.

He told us of a story where a church leader went to visit a Stake Conference far away. The Stake leaders showed up at the airport in jeans and t-shirts and it went downhill from there.

On the leaders way out the Stake President asked him why he obviously wasn't impressed by his stake. The general church leader responded with, "I knew we were in trouble, the minute we got off the plane and couldn't decipher you and the other leaders from the rest of the crowd. You don't go down to the level of the youth to help them, you stand strong where you are at and they will want to reach up." Something like that...don't know if the story is even true; it was just repeated by our Bishop and things could have been added or taken away or tweaked along the way.

But, even if it wasn't true. I am a believer now of the fictional or non-fictional story. Look at these two Youth ministers. And, I had typed a few more sentences here, but I will just leave the post at this. I pray for the victims and the perpetrators.

And, I also pray for the leaders who wear suit and ties in public yet still manage to hurt children behind closed doors. I believe strongly in following my gut as a parent and being very careful with whom I trust. And by golly, if I ever find out that any one of the people that I chose to trust has hurt my child for life, I hope they have a very very good pillow for their cell.

Tar jay

Where is your favorite place to shop?

The kids were so excited to receive these flashing reflectors from the Target workers at a local National Night Out dinner.

The kids thought that the Target workers were more exciting than the chief of police, a local politician, the mayor, and the head of the FBI.

Who am I to argue?

We know which employees offer a 75% off discount of the dollar spot from time to time.

11 photos for 11 years

On

August 15th 1997
LG and me
We were wed
For eternity
In Salt Lake City

In 1997

There was no looking back, only forward.

In 1998

I bulged around the middle.In 1999

We added Abigail

In 2000,

You heeded the call very early every morning and tried to stay awake.

In 2001,

Sophia made us 4.

In 2002,

You worked your way to the top.

In 2003, Bella was born.

2004

will always be a little blurry.

In 2005

We ascended every corner.
In 2006,

The picture was brighter than ever.


In 2007,
Your American education was finally complete.

In 2008 The shadows of the past
added to the pureness of the future
make the perfect picture.