It was a rough day at our house yesterday. This is the note that I went to bed to find. Do you think that Abigail is sassy enough to be a teenager soon? Or maybe I need a parenting class?
Dear Mom,
I really need you to know this but you'll yell at me if I tell it to you directly. You see, it feels like your giving less and less attention to me and the only way to get attention from you is to be a brat.
Also, If you could be less angry that would be great.
Also, I'm getting older, I can take more responsibilities, not like clean the whole family room responsibility, like babysitting, taking care of the baby, making dinner, stuff like that.
Also, I don't know how, but somehow you can't get it through your thick skull that we work better when it's fun, to make it fun, you put on music, make it a game, stuff like that. I'd really appreciate the changes.
Sincerely,
Abigail
I am not sure if I should be proud that I have showed her how to express her feelings so well. Be astounded that she captured the first chapter of The Five Love Languages so insightfully, which teaches that people act badly to get attention. Maybe I could just be amused at the brattiness of "the thick skull". Either way. I know I've got to work on my yelling more. And just so ya'll don't think that I am totally heartless, I will be having a chat with her.
Oh, it's notes like these that make me so excited for my daughters to have children of their own. I am going to photo copy this and cross out her name and write in the name of her child at the bottom and mail it to her someday. I can't wait.
I was considering writing her a note back and leaving it on her pillow tonight.
It would go something like this:
Dear Abigail,
I really need you to know this but you'll yell at me if I tell it to you directly. You see, it feels like your giving less and less attention to me and the only way to get attention from you is to be a brat.
Also, If you could be less angry that would be great.
Also, you're getting older, you can take on more responsibilities, like cleaning the whole family room, AND babysitting, taking care of the baby, making dinner,and a lot of other stuff like that.
Also, I don't know how, but somehow you can't get it through your thick skull that I work better when it's fun, to make it fun, you put on music, make it a game, stuff like that. I'd really appreciate the changes.
Sincerely,
Mom
P.S. I love you and your sassiness and I think you are going to write a great college entrance exam someday and I am WAYYY looking forward to it.
Oh that makes me smile. I'm trying to decide on my favorite line--it may be "Also, if you could be less angry that would be great."
ReplyDeleteMy counselor would say that was an incredibly healthy way to deal with her emotions. Wow!!
ReplyDeleteI think the letter you wrote back would be perfect. Just think you would be telling her that you heard what she was saying & she could learn that often the very things we say we need are the things that we refuse to give. You should be very proud!
I have a daughter who leaves me notes just like that. She is now turning 16 she is more than sassy at times.
ReplyDeleteThat is GREAT! I am impressed that she was able to communicate her feelings to you through a note. Oh the joys of parenthood!
ReplyDeleteHey, at least she's telling you! That makes me laugh! She is such a cutie! And you're a great mom too!!!
ReplyDeleteI would take away her stinking pencils and make her yell at me...That is no way to communicate, what a cheap way out!!! I'm just kidding, I wanted to be the negative one since everyone else was so positive. I thought that was hilarious!!! My favorite is the "I need more responsibility, but not too much, only the fun stuff"!!!
ReplyDeleteThat is great! My daughter has left me several similar notes, only shorter. I am right there with you sister. It is a good reflection of truth though, wouldn't you say? Kids will tell it to you straight. I've been working on better communication with my own kiddos. Why is it that yelling comes so easy? It is like weight... it takes a lot of hard work to make it go away!
ReplyDeleteWow, this is great! You are a wonderful mom, Ali, and you have such a cool family. Thanks for sharing! Love and miss you all!
ReplyDeletethat is too funny.
ReplyDeleteI am glad to know other good moms yell too....ha
Abigail's letter gives me an idea. I bet our kids would love to find a letter on their pillow at night every now and then. Expressing our love, our thoughts of where they are in life, or even our disappointments/challenges.
Audrey gets really embarrassed over all sorts of things, so this could open up a whole new line of communication for us.
this little letter abigail wrote could be the next "pay it forward" for me and my kids.
thanks for sharing,
Dorry
SO funny. Definitely save it for when she's older! My daughter is turning 13 in 3 weeks....she doesn't care if I get mad, she lets me know her feelings directly.
ReplyDeleteEveryday.
I LOVE IT!
ReplyDeleteOh Promise that you save that letter!! My Mom saved some things in a shoe box...I had made her a Mothers Day Card that said,
ReplyDelete"Your the best Mother I ever had!"
She will get a kick out of that letter someday. I can picture your face as you read that! Keep up the good work...and if you can ever get away...maybe a MotherDay's Gift from Hubby...flights to Orlando are $9.99 out of Tricities ROUNDTRIP!!
Miss you!
Abigail is awesome. I wish I had that kind of skill in letter writing to mom. Mine went like this.
ReplyDeleteDear MOm,
I hate you.
Love, Katina
So fantastic! Your response is perfection!
ReplyDeleteOkay this is perfect. Ha ha!!!! Keep that sassy alive and well!
ReplyDelete